So D day is here -- F day probably is a bit crude -- Facebook is now public. You want in on the action, you want a taste of the hype, your chalice of koolaid is empty and you need a hit baaaaaaaaaaad... well, here's the inside scoop from the offices of Build-a-Beard CFO.

The FB stock wont do as good as you thought, or even as good as it should, for one simple fact we know (and you probably do too)... because of Mr. Zuckerber's (aka Zucks, aka Is that a question, aka FB CEO, aka I own your face, aka Richie Rich) facial hairlessness. A face that by all Google image research accounts has never even had as much as a stubble on his chinny chin chin.

For shame sir, you're public now... now more than ever you need to man up, grow up and like your ownership of Facebook, you need to maintain at least 53% of your face with hair. Consider this a challenge, we dare you to #proveit... or at least fund a facial hair charity like Movember, Bearduary or other facial hair cheerleaders like say... us... to help fight and stop pogonophobia.

Until then...

The international beard community recently lost a dear friend.  Alf Jarrald from Manchester, England, was a long time member of the Handlebar Club in London.  At the age of 83 he placed second overall at the 2003 World Beard and Moustache Championships in Carson City, Nevada.  We will miss his cheerful smile and remember him fondly.

John Axford, the stellar Milwaukee Brewers relief pitcher who in 2011 took home the Robert Goulet Memorial Mustached American of the Year award, finally demonstrated mortality by blowing a rare save attempt after converting a club-record 49 in a row. He didn’t want to stick around and talk to reporters afterward so he left the following note on his locker for the media.

Do you pride yourself on facial hair excellence? Do you wear your facial hair on your own terms – regardless of trends or what the boss man says? Have you ever kicked a vegetarian just for pleasure? Do you encourage bare faced mortals to see the light of day?

If you answered “yes” to any of these questions, then you could be the next Wahl Man of the Year.

So whether you sport a handsome lip garment, a burly beard, or even something in between — we encourage Mustached Americans to enter today.

Fifteen finalists will win $500 and a Lithium Ion + Stainless Steel Trimmer, and one of them will win an additional $1,000 and the title of Wahl Man of the Year.

Most important, Wahl will donate $1 for every trim on their Face the Day Tour to the LIVESTRONG Foundation (see the tour schedule here).  And that does not suck.

The facial-hair fraternity is well known for its creativity and independence and it is not unusual for those with lip sweaters to be small-business innovators and job creators. Indeed, Mustached Americans are an integral part of our economic recovery and it is rare that those sporting the ‘stache back down from a fight, especially if it’s a bully.

A clear example of this comes from New England in Bo Muller-Moore, the creator of EAT MORE KALE t-shirts, from Central Vermont, who is locked in a legal battle with Chick-fil-A, a fight which could be called the classic battle of Bo v. the Bovine.

Bo has been producing his artisanal quality, environmentally friendly product in Montpelier, which is more than 100 miles from the nearest Chick-fil-A franchise. Even so, the Georgia-based fast-food chain seems to fear that his product, which is only T-Shirts, might detract from their more than $4 billion sales of mediocre chicken sandwiches.

That, or they think that a properly spelled EAT MORE KALE is too easily confused with the advertising slogan Chick-fil-A launched in 1995: “Eat mor chikin.”

Bo...

The third annual Beard Team USA National Beard and Moustache Championships will take place on Sunday, November 11, 2012, at the Clark County Government Center Amphitheater in Downtown Las Vegas, Nevada. The amphitheater, with lawn seating for 3000 beardsmen and their fans, is located ¾ mile from the world-famous Golden Nugget Hotel and Casino, which will serve as host hotel for the event.

The competition is open to everyone, regardless of nationality, experience, or group affiliation.  For the first time in history, the Nationals will utilize the seventeen-category system commonly employed at the World Beard and Moustache Championships. The categories range from the delicate Dali moustache to the anything-goes full beard freestyle.

Online registra...

The 2013 World Beard and Moustache Championships will take place on November 2, 2013, in Leinfelden-Echterdingen, Germany.  The event will be organized by the Beard and Culture Club Belle Moustache, whose slogan is “Diese Baerte haben Kultur!” (“These beards have culture!”)

Leinfelden-Echterdingen is a suburb of Stuttgart, located in Southwestern Germany in the region of Swabia, not far from the Black Forest.  The area is famous for Mercedes-Benzes, local wine, and Spaetzle, but don’t worry, there is beer too.

If you find Leinfelden-Echterdingen a bit of a mouthful, just call it “L.E.,” but remember that “E” in German is pronounced like “A” in English.

See you in L.E. (pronounced “L.A.”).

Check it out!  I’ve started what could prove to be the greatest beard knowledge resource of all time!

If you know anything at all about beards, please write some articles on what you know – right now.  A wiki only becomes great if people muster the courage to contribute.  Since we The Bearded are known for our courage, this shouldn’t be a problem.

The guy who created this contacted me and I had to share. Click the picture for full size.

Created by: OnlinePhD.org

When you’re featured in Vegas, life is good. Very good.

That’s why the Mustached American community reached a pinnacle moment when it was announced that the Segway-riding, chalkboard-loving, leisure suit-wearing brainiac Professor Wattson will become the first mustached clay-animated American to be featured at a Las Vegas convention.

Professor Wattson

Professor Wattson (who has no first name), an expert in power management, will make a much-anticipated appearance at Booth 2151 of the Eaton Power Quality division at the 2012 Interop conference.

Although Las Vegas draws more conventions than mustaches draw women — as well as more mustached men than a Tom Selleck look-alike contest — city officials have long-barred the two from mixing.

But on May 8, hundreds of years of prejudice will finally come to an end when Professor Wattson’s expert power management advice proudly travels through the bristles of his neatly groomed lip sweater, a...

Well, folks, my hosting provider “upgraded” my server this week without notifying me first.  In the process, they conveniently deleted the SQL database for the Beard Coach.  Awesome.  Thank goodness I backed it up for the first time ever just a few months ago.

I just recreated the database and restored the previous files.  Sadly, that just took us all back in time to January.  That means no winner to the beard playoffs (Brett Kiesel) and no Beard Wiki (was not lost and will be back shortly).

Thanks for your patience as I get the site back up and running between juggling my full-time job, college coursework to meet continuing education requirements for said job, and raising my eight-month-old daughter!

Noting his commitment to ruggedly swift judicial decisiveness and a with a decorated career as a Mustached American law enforcement officer, the non-partisan American Mustache Institute today endorsed Ray Thomas for District Attorney of Brazos County, Texas.

“The breadth of Ray’s commitment to a dynamic Mustached American lifestyle, as well as his experience in both public service and criminal justice, make him an ideal candidate to be tough on crime and protect Brazos County,” said Dr. Albert Gorithm, AMI’s director of criminal justice accounting and measurement. “Even a quick look at his 30-year-career demonstrates that he has been working to improve and protect his community with both rugged handsomeness and raw, authoritarian power.”

Thomas, an AMI member in good standing, has owned and operated an upper lip garment since graduating high school in 1982. He has since served professionally in emergency medical services, juvenile probation services, representation of Children’s Protective Services, as a Texas peace officer, and currently as a Texas prosecutor.

“I am humbled by the support of my fellow people of Mustached American heritage,” said Thomas. &#...